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Respite
It isn't possible to talk about self-care for family caregivers without talking about respite. More than any other service respite is what family caregivers want most. The primary purpose of respite care is to provide relief from the extraordinary and intensive demands of ongoing care to someone with special needs, thereby strengthening the family's ability to provide care. Respite care is planned and proactive. Respite means taking a break before extreme stress and crisis occurs.
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The following is excerpted from Love, Honor, & Value by Suzanne Mintz, President/Co-founder of the National Family Caregivers Association "I've come to think of respite as coming in three sizes..." MORE |
A respite doesn't have to mean a week on the French Riviera, although that sounds pretty nice. It doesn't even have to be a weekend visiting friends, at least not at first. A respite can be as simple as lying on the couch with the lights dimmed listening to your favorite music, especially if you do it on a regular basis. It can be going to the movies or having a manicure every other week. You might even think of your three times a week exercise routine as a respite, if you enjoy it, rather than thinking of it as something you do because it is good for you.
What you do on a respite break, regardless of its length, is up to you. It has to meet your needs, break your tensions, and renew your spirit. It needs to be the right medicine to cure, or at least ameliorate your current stress. It needs to be for you, precisely because you do so much for others and because you deserve it.
Next time you feel guilty for even thinking about taking a break, remember it is only partially for your benefit. Your loved one will reap a great deal of the benefit as well. Respites are guaranteed to take the edge off your tension, renew your energy and give you a fresh dollop of patience with which to pick up your caregiving duties once again. Respite is the primary mechanism you have as a family caregiver to refill your tank and thereby keep on going.
Two family members volunteered to give us relief [from caring for my mom] for a week's family vacation. We had a wonderful time with our sons and came back refreshed.- Ruthann S. McDonough, Carmel, Indiana
A number of studies have proven the value of respite to caregivers and their loved ones. A paper published in fall, 2001 in Focal Point, a journal of the Regional Research Institute for Human Services at Portland State University explored the benefits of respite for parents of children with emotional and behavioral disorders, showed that respite enhanced the capacity to cope with stress, lessened the number of institutionalizations, and created greater optimism about the caregiver's ability to continue to provide care.
A study of caregivers of Alzheimer's patients published in the Journal of the American Medical Association in 1996 showed that respite and counseling lessens depression and helps caregivers avoid nursing home placement for their loved one for as much as a year.
Click here for a list of Respite Resources